I hate Mondays. Start of the working week. Start of another week crammed full of Autism unfriendly situations. People. Noise. The vagaries of temperature control.
I’m sitting on the sofa in “my spot”. It’s my spot because it’s where I sit. Not at the other end. Don’t like the other end. Sitting there feels strange. It’s uncomfortable. Alien. Odd.
The clock in the hallway is clacking and whirring. Once upon a time that was an annoyance. A sensory assault but now it’s part of the background noise, soothing, regular. When I lie awake in the middle of the night I can hear it tick ticking away in the dark. It’s like the worlds heartbeat, it’s telling me that everything’s alright, that the worlds still turning.
It’s 6.36 and I have been up for precisely 24 minutes.
There’s a low hum in the air. Inaudible to most but the hum forms the baseline for all other noise. The clock, the occasional car passing outside, the soft cooing of the birds on the telephone wires. The Monday morning melody makers!.
Or perhaps the hum is the dough and the rest are just audible pizza toppings!
Bad night. Sunday nights usually are bad. Poor, restless sleep, up and down like a yo-yo (another activity beyond my feeble coordination), bad IBS attack, dry retching, stiffness and soreness.
Crammed full of anxiety, nervous, dry mouthed, swollen and sore tummy. Yes it’s certainly Monday again.
I should be home from work in precisely 9 hours time. I say should be because that’s subject to being picked up on time. I have little control over the traffic on the country lanes or my partners memory!.. ‘What was I supposed to be doing at 4.30 ???”…
The sky’s quite bright but after a weekend of warm, unbroken sunshine, it’s much cooler. A white sky, not a blue sky.
Cat one has taken up her position on the windowsill. Ever vigilant she scans the road and car park outside for signs of unwelcome visitors or extra breakfast. I know which she would prefer.
In precisely 31 minutes I will commence coffee and tea making. Coffee for myself, tea for my other half (though she will only wake up when it’s gone cold). I’m not much of a breakfast person. Full English is too time consuming and messy, toast annoys me (I blame erratic toasters) and we’ve run out of my cereal (Special K with chocolate curls) so it will just be coffee for me. Coffee and pills. Another dose of infighting tables designed to keep fibromyalgia bearable, diabetes under control, acid reflux down and IBS an occasional flare up.
But because it’s Monday and there’s the extra anxiety involved they’ll fight amongst themselves for control of my body. So I’ll feel even worse within an hour or two.
Don’t you just love Mondays ?.
I hope you have a wonderful day.