Things are not going well.
Understatement. This week I’ve reached out for support to someone who should be on my side where work is concerned, someone who should look at what I have to say and be supportive.
Well I’m sure you can guess how that’s ended.
I’ve been told I’m wrong. Basically told that I don’t see what goes on and that therefore my …..concerns…are wrong.
Of course that ignores the fact that some transparency…some…communication might be useful…so I wouldn’t misinterpret in the future?. But that doesn’t seem to occur to them.
The fact I’m Autistic also seems to be ignored. Probably brushed under the carpet with the rest of my concerns. I’m not asking for special treatment but I am asking to be treated as an individual. Sadly I think that’s too much for them.
I’m frustrated. Frustrated that the points I make are ignored. Of course I expected it so I guess I shouldn’t torture myself by doing it again but I can’t help it, I find it so hard to let things go.
And I’m sad. I’m sad that the person just toed the party line, unwilling to deviate from it, unwilling to admit that any mistakes were made.
I came away from reading his email thinking..no, believing that I’ve done something wrong. I haven’t but that’s how it feels, the lone voice in the wilderness, the odd one out, the black sheep of the family.
And that’s how it always ends. Me, on my own, wanting support, wanting to make things better for others but being the only one who seems to care.
And being washed away by the tide.